The Borderline

Last night felt like a dream- a stupid, wonderful dream i wish i never have to wake up from. Everything finally fell perfectly into place; and it felt glorious.

I still love you. Yes, i still do. There’s no point in hiding it now. No matter how bad our relationship got, i am still glad we happened. Because i needed this relationship in my life. I needed you in my life.

Continue reading The Borderline


Gypsy Soul Tales: My Press Cafe Experience

I have always been a bookworm since when i was a kid. Everything about books fascinates me. I love to read. I love the smell of books. I love going to book fairs and i like being surrounded by books. Sometimes, i can spend like 5 hours of my day or more just lurking around at any bookstore- reading books even without buying them.

On top of the list of my most visited bookstores is Fullybooked, though i had just found out about the place 2 years ago when a branch nearby opened up (ATC branch). National bookstore and Powerbooks were my main solitary places back then but the thing about Fullybooked that instantly caught my heart aside from its tranquil ambiance is that it has a coffee shop attached to it: the Press Cafe. Continue reading Gypsy Soul Tales: My Press Cafe Experience

Gypsy Soul Tales: Mid Year Scheme

We’re almost halfway through 2015, and i cannot deny the fact that my life has been a bit bland lately. Most of my days have been revolving with just three things: exams, papers, projects. Not even sleep. These past few months had been a little too tough towards us UP students, because we had to make a lot of adjustments within ourselves after the academic calendar had been shifted.

Sleep had been elusive- making it seem like gaining a few hours of sleep was already a luxury. Seeing summer getaway-related posts on facebook by our friends always stung; made us really envious because while they were on the beach having a splendid time with their families and loved ones, where were we? Well, stuck in our dormitories- either studying or stuDYING. This semester was indeed, a very long one. But we’re finally reaching the end of it in a few days and the idea of it excites me. Very much. After a very long time of pure agony caused by all the shitload of schoolwork we used to do every minute, i think we all deserve to loosen up a bit and have a really nice breather. Thus, i made a short list of my potential itinerary this mid year: Continue reading Gypsy Soul Tales: Mid Year Scheme

Freshmen Registration 2015

Around this time of the year, thousands of incoming freshmen usually make their way to the university for their registration. My organization (The UP Entrepreneur’s Club) ostensibly sponsored for the event and it turned out that the sponsorship includes helping the USC members to assist these oblivious freshies all through out their registration process. Of course, i was really glad to help. Continue reading Freshmen Registration 2015

Life Gets Better, Make Sure You’re There to See It


Has anyone of you already felt tired of life, not the mawkish kind of tired but the real exhaustion of the idea of living or i should say, existing itself

Has anyone of you felt that excruciating heaviness in your chest upon opening your eyes in the morning, which once drove you into this wishful thinking that if only you could just stop breathing then it will be the end of your agony, for once

Has anyone of you ever smoked a cigarette so fast you hoped your lungs would just explode and let your whole system shut down, just like that

Has anyone of you wished to escape the labyrinth of reality so much that if disappearing was only possible you would’ve done it forever ago

Has anyone of you ever been haunted by monsters in your sleep, those monsters you do not typically see in movies but the ones who torture you, like stabbing you a thousand times in the chest making it seem like dying was such a luxury

Has anyone of you ever felt that excruciating pang of longing for something that you know would never come back

Has anyone of you ever felt that sense of complete powerlessness realizing that everything seems so wrong and you had no way of putting things right

Has anyone of you decided that you were neither happy nor unhappy, and that was why you couldn’t go on

Continue reading Life Gets Better, Make Sure You’re There to See It

Portrait 19

Photo Credits: Isabel Quinones
Photo Credits: Isabel Quinones
Photo Credits: Isabel Quinones
Photo Credits: Isabel Quinones

I cannot believe it has almost been a month since the day i turned 19

I find it odd and amazing at the same time – how fast time flies. Been through a lot of obnoxious stuff and been with a lot of remorseless people along the way but hey, there were a lot of nice people too and i must say, both kinds taught me huge things about life that nothing can ever beat. Continue reading Portrait 19

High Hopes

Hello reader

I am giddy to tell everyone that i am now moving from Tumblr to WordPress. Ever since i was just a stupid, innocent kid who didnt like reading that much and sucked at grammar, Tumblr had always been my home. It is the place where i started learning how to express myself, and to be open with my thoughts which really did help me… since i am an only child and i usually had no one to talk to. Tumblr taught me a lot about life. From those posts which i could really relate to (given that my love life always suck) to the friends i made just from most of the TA’s i used to get… i think i can now conclude that for me, Tumblr is more than just a blogging site, for it can also be a companion and a friend. Somehow, it saved my life

Now, why am i moving?

I am moving because i have figured that my heart is craving for something new. Sadly, i felt the lack of inspiration to continue writing on my old blog for some reason. And i think the reason is that it contains too much of my past and as sappy as this may sound, it hinders my thoughts from flowing. The thing is, i dont wanna be stuck in the labyrinth of my past anymore. I simply want to start over, with a blank slate.

The girl who used to write in there is too innocent, naive and close-minded. She easily gives in to the slightest heat she feels from the littlest flame she sees. She easily gets hurt, for she isn’t aware of how cruel the world that she belongs in is. She thinks that no one would hurt her, because she would never hurt anyone intentionally. She is too kind, too subtle – therefore giving them more power to inflict pain towards her.

But she does not stay this way forever. The pain, the agony, the pang she used to feel in her chest woke her up to the sad reality. That odd reality that every human being is capable of doing terrible things given the chance, whether or not you hurt them. People are generally selfish and dishonest in nature and she had learned that putting her guard down could kill her, or worse – torture her. That’s why she stopped being altruistic and started loving herself. She wanted to survive this world, this filthy world

I am not the same girl anymore – this is why i am leaving. I already find it hard to keep up with the personality i used to express in there. I would like to believe that the girl who used to write in that blog is already dead. I like her dead. And today marks the day i begin leaving whatever wasn’t healthy. This meant people, beliefs and habits – anything that kept me small. So here i am, starting all over again.

Deleting all my posts actually crossed my mind, but i perceived it would take too much time than necessary. So i ended up making a new one, which i really hope will inspire you as much as the old one did. I am not asking you to increase your expectations, but i think the lessons that i have acquired from all the experiences i have gone through for the past few months will surely aid me in writing my new entries. And i will solemnly try not to fill my posts with too much cynicism and profanity, so dont worry! *winks*

I believe that there are two ways of telling your story. One is to tell it compellingly and direly, keep returning to it because you see your present suffering as the result of your past experiences. I may be dwelling in telling mine this way for too long, and this is the reason why today i am going to step out of my comfort zone and tell it from a place where it no longer dominates me. I hope that in time, i can speak about it with a certain distance and see it as the way to my present and future freedom.

Hello, WordPress